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To My Future Daughters


Dear Future Daughters,
   take it from an old fella like me, life sucks: good people die and bad people live, bad people die and good people live. in the end i've come to terms with the fact that it is but perception that plays an important role in shaping one's life. take these to heart, hold them dear to you and if at any time i made you feel bad,i want you to know that i'm sorry and i'm not sorry. i'm sorry because i should have tried alot harder to be the perfect parent. i'm not sorry because there's nothing on earth like a "perfect parent". maybe when you come of age you'd know that some things we do are out of our control as much as they're within control. sometimes, they're predestined, other times they could have happend differently.

  in growing, be fair. play, blossom, fall a few times, get up,  dust your butt and play some more, learn what you can (time waits for no man; including you my darlings ), oppose: argue a little some of our rules and commands (older people sometimes get into the character of elders vigorously- too much, i know) but in opposing, be fair. think of yourself in our shoes: seeing your child wanting to make the same mistakes as you, same mistakes that landed you in real trouble during your prime. think of that and be fair my darlings.
in waiting, be wise. wise people do not go around bragging about their wisdom (that is foolishness at it's core). be wise, but wear a camouflage of simplicity. remember, in every waiting room, the aim is to make a guest wait comfortably for as long as possible. leave exotic magazines and cool movies in your waiting room but know the limit. boundaries are the real foundation in any relationship.
in loving, be fair and wise. pay attention and keep to heart what i am about to say: in any relationship, do not lose yourself. i repeat, do not lose yourself. it is in losing one's self the other party becomes burdened. never for once duobt your values or compromise your beliefs for "love". true love is plain and honest. demanding nothing more than just being yourself, being loved for being yourself; uniquely you, good and bad. be fair and think of your partner's wants even when sometimes they get too demanding. think of how the sun must feel, having to stay bright all day, and yet, without complaint, shines and stays beautiful, doing her thing.
in raising your kids be firm. firm and wise, loving and true, trusting and caring . and like the wind, swift, breezy and airy. i cannot say much because you have to be the master of this particular ship. remember however,  to caution them else they fall victims of situational disasters.
in dealing with others, let your light so shine. radiate the true essence of you, as you. this i feel is the greatest gift for every man. and in your dealings be honest, patient, soft and hard, swift but smooth, clear and tough, and like M.  Ali, "fly like a butterfly, sting like a bee. "
in ageing , be young. this can only be achieved by a healthy lifestyle. i know you know by now how difficult this can be. be patient and consistent, in honesty and loyalty, in loving and conviction, choose your words like you do your food, your friends like you do your anger (very minimal and precise). give your partner all the love your heart can contain and i've come to notice it's a lot!
in dying, be strong, be reborn, be brave. think of heaven, the afterlife, the generation you contributed in bringing forth and just how beautiful life has been even when it flies by without mostly warning. in death, be a source of joy, peace, love and happiness. be a statue of liberty for the ones who never believed in themselves. be to them the birth of courage.
in dying my dears, leave for the ones to come, a new nation.
there are a million and two things i am yet to say, probably a thousand i'd leave unsaid but trust i'll write often to you; you and the daughters of the daughters of your daughters.
from your mother,
a jewel in Savannah.
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