Skip to main content

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" OR BETTER STILL "I'M TOO LAZY TO EXPRESS MY SUPRISE"

Every single day I get out of my bed, I hear approximately thirty "Are you serious?-es" ("es" being the plural suffix).
From my rommates, to my neighbours, the gossipy girls I walk pass,my friends, the couple arguing at a corner and even myself (haha you thought I wouldn't mention myself?).
In my close observation, the "are you serious?" can be used in various situations depending on the speakers' state of mind.
An "are -y-o-u se-rious?!" usually with the syllabes of "you" and "serious" stressed indicates the speaker is totally suprised at seeing someone after a long time; friend or foe. E.g. (sees a friend after two years) Mike! Are yooou seeeeerious?!....is that yoou..?

The second case, a curt "are you serious!" is usually more of an exclamation of suprise at what the first speaker might have disclosed or an entirely astonishing find. The voice usually takes a higher pitch than the first case. E.g. Speaker 1:"Fayose is getting married next month." Speaker 2: (out of suprise) "Are you serious!"
Finally, the "are you serious?" out of disappointment. In this case the voice is lower, the syllables are shorter and spoken faster followed by a series of curse words, a sigh or a disappointing heave. E.g. (sees an ice-cream stand after à long walk under the sun, stops to buy and seller refuses to sell because he/she has no change) are you serious!? (sighs,rains down curses).
N.B. Another kind of "are you serious" exists. This kind is usually followed by a laugh or giggle. It what I've named the "gossipy are you serious?" It contains the lightest bit of suprise and is usually a go-ahead for the "gister" to go ahead. This is usually the climax of the gossip. E.g. Speaker 1: ...and Tolu caught her bf with her cousin shagging on vals day.... Speaker 2: (giggles) are you serious..(laughs some more) then what happened...
So next time you in an "are you serious?" situation, err try and understnd which is directed to you. You never can tell what you'd figure out.
And in case you like me and tired of the "are you serious?" catchphrase and want to hear something better and authentic, contact me and we'll talk. (I even want to stop saying it!! already).
Happy holiday pals and to those who still have exams to write; "Are You Serious?!"
Grace Okogwu
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

SATURDAY SAD TALES

It was impossible to completely assimilate what Richard was going on about; what the group of umunna’s scattered around our sitting room were going on about. The only two words that had registered in my mind were, “new” and “wife”, and I wasn’t even upset. Hadn’t I seen this coming? Hadn’t my instincts warned me? My vicious mother-in-law from the start, threatened?No, I wasn’t upset; I was completely slapped across the face with surprise. I thought finally Richard and I were fine, that we were gone past the rocky months in our marriage. He’d been smiling more often the past few weeks. He told me just last week how much he loved me: with his eyes, like he did the first day he saw me, that day at the Customer Service room in the First Bank Headquarters of Nsukka, on the chilly day of December 4th .

Richard’s eyes were what Professor Agu¸our Classical English literature final year professor described as “sorrowful but intense; the kind of eyes that draws you in to want to know more...” he…

MARY DOES NOT KNOW

September1       September ushered in the last of the rains;  the kind that fell noiselessly and without the fierce winds like in May and June. 

May 17        May was when I saw it, the fierce eyes of Soluja the mad man. it had been a cloudy day, one where, the blackness of the cloud thickened, breaking up now and then with thunder and lightening, darkening my mood like charcoal.
       i was sitting by the window of the moving bus, lost in thought, what people refer to as being "absent minded," when my eyes met the mad man's. i'd expected to meet a blank expression but what my eyes saw were alert pupils; pointy unblinking eyes  with an air of artistic craziness. almost as if he could see through my fears, past my boldness to dare stare at him. he could see all of my secrets and those eyes,  still haunt me till this day...  

June 5           if i turned, she would definitely know i was staring at her and i wasn't about to give her the satisfaction of being admired. low…

20 REASONS TO JOIN AIESEC

If you have been curious about improving your leadership skills or joining the best student extra curriculum organisation eveer! then you're in luck because AIESEC is interested in YOU. Quickly go through these reasons to join AIESEC today.1. Go on a work abroad experience, develop your leadership skills.2.Network and meet new people in your university, around Nigeria and in 110 countries we are present in.3. Be a part of a network of ambitious and talented AIESEC leaders around the world and utilize this network for the rest of your life.4. Get the opportunity to travel to different places through the various conferences within and outside Nigeria.5. Find a suitable Mentor who can guide you through your career decisions and many life experiences.6. Cultivate a global mindset and develop entrepreneurial outlook in a flexible and customizable work environment.7. Increase awareness on things outside your text book through practical international experience and on the job learning.8.…